What we didn’t do during the holidays

Potty train.

Eirinn is not ready yet.  She’s not physically ready.  She tells me when she has soiled her diaper (did you like how I didn’t say ‘poop’?), but only afterwards and nothing about wetting.  She also doesn’t love the potty itself.  I’m working on that.  She got two different potty books for Christmas, which I’ve put into her bathroom right by the potty.  But still, if you ask her if she wants to go pee-pee on the potty, she usually says no.

I also don’t think she would be able to remember and follow such a complex set of instructions.  There’s a lot more than just tinkling in the pot, you know.  You have to:

  1. recognize the sensation of having to…do your bidness
  2. make it to the potty in time
  3. pull down your pants and undergatchies
  4. sit down on the potty so that your whole bum in hovering over the bowl
  5. do said bidness
  6. WIPE THE CONTAMINATED AREA SUFFICIENTLY CLEAN
  7. get off the pot
  8. pull up your gatchies
  9. flush the toiley if you’re big enough to use the big girl potty
  10. wash your hands
  11. tell mommy or daddy they get the wonderful job of emptying the potty of its contents if you aren’t big enough to use the big girl potty

That’s a lot to ask of a not-yet-22 month old.  Not that I’m saying it’s impossible because I’m sure there have been plenty of potty trained 22 month olds.  I’m just not convinced Eirinn could do all that.  Even though she is the smartest little girl on the face of the planet between the ages of 0 and 5.  And even some older than that.  Potty training just isn’t her subject of strength just yet.

So I’m not going to push it.  YET.  With the fetupus due in July, we are now on a fairly tight schedule because I really, really, really do not want to have two in diapers at the same time (pretty please don’t make me).  Also, being brand name whores addicts fans (hi, Pampers, I love you!  Even if you are perfumed and occasionally leak and are emblazoned with commercialized characters my daughter has been programed to love, I’m not mad at you.  I like the smell and it’s my fault you leak when I don’t buy the most expensive line and Elmo is kind of cute, no?) we can’t afford that many diapers.  And who wants to spend that much of their life looking at poop?  I know I don’t.

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