Dog-lick, in pictures

As promised, here is a brief history of Bosco kissing Eirinn:

The displays of uber-affection began as soon as I started giving Eirinn “tummy time.”  Any time she was his height, he took advantage and struck.  And this boy can strike from afar.  He does have a three foot tongue, no exaggeration.  Proven by science that he has The Worlds Longest Tongue.  Also, he’s been runner up in The Worlds Fastest Tongue Competition for three consecutive years.  Plus?  He’s OCD about the licking.  He can not stop.  He gets in the licking zone and there’s no breaking free.  You literally have to push him off of you before he will stop kissing you right in the face. 

So, let’s do the math:

OCD + record breaking tongue length and speed + vulnerable, immobile baby + camera addicted mother who’d rather “capture the moment” than save her baby from dog-lick = good times for Bossy AND/OR hilarious photographic future-boyfriend repellent.


Case #1 – June 22, 2006


“Why, hello!  What do we have here?  A yet-to-be-licked face?  We must rectify this situation.”


“Hey-yo!  What are you, you fuzzy little person? You look so innocent and…”


“WTF!?!  In the eye?  Did you have to get me right in the eyeball?  Duuuuuude.  Not. Cool.  When I get full range of motion out of these here fingers, your fur is mine.”


Case #2 – September 28, 2006


“Again?  In the ear this time?  Gah…man, you’re good.”


“The eye, too?  Touchè, old friend.  Touchè.”


Case #3 – September 8, 2007


“It’s been a long time, com-padre.”


The boy’s still got it. 


Some things will never change.  As long as Bosco has a tongue and is able to stick it out, someone, somewhere, maybe even you, is getting it in one of their facial orifices.  And if you complain?  Well, he’s less than a foot tall.  What were you doing with your face so close to his mouth to begin with?  I think at some level you wanted him to lick your molars…

And until Eirinn stops finding it funny or they discover that dog saliva up the nose cavity causes cancer, I’ll be there to laugh and document and share with the world.


1 Response to “Dog-lick, in pictures”

  1. 1 J.D. July 13, 2008 at 11:38 am

    Hilarious – you made my wife and I laugh, thank you!


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Tornado Eirinn

The life and times, trials and tribulations, crimes and punishments, lessons learned and scores settled by my daughter, Eirinn, AKA The Tornado.

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October 2007
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